To Save the Galaxy
by Olive343
Summary: Just a little flick across the mind of Shepard at two defining moments of the Reaper War. SPOILERS for ME3 ending in Chapter 2.
1. Death

Just a quick something I thought up today over lunch. Enjoy!

**DISCLAIMER**: Mass Effect and all other situations regarding ME are trademaks of Bioware

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You run, all the way to the end of the hall, helmet under one arm and hair slapping against your neck.

There! A few tense moments and its done, you've sent the call. Finally jamming the helmet down, you take a deep breath as the recyclers whir up to speed. The one you love rushes around the corner, eyes frantic in her search. As she sees you, her eyes slow down and she calms.

It doesn't last. You tell her to run, that help is coming and that she has to go. You can see the moment her heart breaks a little bit because yours does to. You are struck with the inexplicable feeling that this will be the last meeting for a long while.

You run through burning corridors and feel the telltale kick as life pods fly out of the ship. _Good_, you think,_ they're alive. _You head for one too when the voice over the intercom buzzes through. _Thank goodness, _you think, _he's still alive._

_Shit_, you think again, _what's he still doing here?_ Run. You pass through the void and you're struck by he notion that if not for the flash frozen bodies then this would be beautiful. Beneath the blue glow of the world above, all is quiet.

You run to the bridge and find the last man. As gently as you can, you get him to the pod. You move to sit with him but you're too late and go flying. You grab onto something –anything- and find that your dumb luck has landed you on the launch button. He calls; he wants you to get to him. Your eyes lock and you're not sure how much he sees, but you see devotion and acceptance.

You crush him too, the same way you did her. Push the button and launch yourselves away. He to safety, you to God only knows where. You hear the sound of walnuts cracking and dimly you realize that was your ribs. You stretch to engage the rebreather, ignoring your flaming chest. You send the command but you can't breathe. This has nothing to do with the ribs, which make what little breath you can take taste like blood.

Gas. You hear gas escaping. You reach again and your chest is an inferno, from your ribs and your lungs. The pipe, you realize –the stupid EXTERNAL pipe- is almost totally severed. You see a bright flash that is exactly the colour of vomit and you try to laugh at the irony because you feel like vomiting too.

You end up in a coughing fit –but there's no relief- you can't draw cooling breath. This is it, you think oddly calm as your vision blackens around the edges. The last thing you see is the most soothing shade of blue and the last thing you think is: _So this is what you get for saving the galaxy._


	2. Decisions

You stand on the cold platform as the last war rages around you and an impossible child rationalizes genocide. You want nothing more than to lie down and rest, but you know that the rest will be your last if you take it. And you cannot take it.

You are the first organic here, ever. As this sinks in through your pain-blinded mind, you stare around yourself dumbly. _Majestic_, you think. _Sad_, you realize. Lit by humanity's last hope and seen only by one human it is tragic beyond words.

The child continues to speak. _How did it come to this_, you wonder? How does the fate of the galaxy boil down to one decision made by a single human? _Acceptance_, you think. _Madness_, you realize. Under scrutiny, all of your actions up to now are insane: You disregard your health, your position, even your life. Always expecting someone to take note, to understand the truth of your beliefs.

_It was belief_, you conclude. Your belief in the cause, in the better nature of people, in the possibility of victory. And when that failed, what kept you going was her belief in you.

Your eyes drift back to the apparition before you. You can't tell if that is its true appearance or if you are just delirious. You wave your ruined pistol and fire a shot to check. It passes through with a buzz. Stupid hologram, you decide, as you clutch the pistol to your side –it doesn't work, but it was a gift from her- as it begins to speak again.

Options, impossible choices.

You can act as expected and save them all but damning what remains of desert world's life to extinction far from home._ No_. You aren't the kind to sanction genocide. You forgave a helpless race twice for their sins, you will not forsake another.

You can act as That Man wanted you to do and wrest their minds from their grasp, which is not really a choice at all. It reeks too much of their own insidious methods and plots. _No_. You cauterized a bastard offshoot of a race rather than take their minds from them, for the exact same reason that you won't do it now, because it would be too much like slavery.

The impossible child must sense the desperation your eyes betray as it grudgingly reveals a third choice. You can –as always- defy all expectations and instead of destroying, create. It would be a path unlike anything ever seen. _It would not be perfect, or even understood, but it would be right_.

You gaze around and your eyes lock on the light. Blue. Her blue. You know what you have to do.

Shuffling forward, picking up a pace, you head for the beam. Ignoring the pain in your legs and the familiar fire that's lit itself inside your chest. You ignore the splat splat of blood as it leaks from your chest and the smell of cooked meat as you head for your goal. You force the pistol against your thigh and –miraculously- it stays.

Run now. Almost there.

You run and ignore the scream of tortured and overworked muscles as you leap one last time. At the final instant you are struck by a sudden illogical sense of vertigo as you see the depth of the pit. It is not bottomless but you will never reach the bottom. Then you are in, bathe in brilliant blue fire.

It hurts in a way you could never describe; your muscles tense and you can't even scream. You can feel your ruined body fading away, giving everything, until it is all gone. Because this is what you believe in.

Then you are gone and the hope is ready, glowing with your belief. Your last spark of awareness triggers it and then that is gone to.

And this is how you save the galaxy.

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Hope you enjoyed. Please review!


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